It appears Democracy has failed Lord Chambers again. The old facist won't be best pleased to learn he has been voted September's Gimp of the month. But the vote was unanimous. 1. His regualar outbursts, concerning the working classes and the North/South divide 2. He thinks he is ace at tennis and fencing 3. He thinks he is the best at history, politics, debating; no Chambers you are only the best at being big headed 4. He won't visit our website, even though he is dying to. If you are reading this Chambers, we win, ha, ha, ha 5.He has schoolboy crushes on the following:- Ann Widdecombe Margaret Thatcher Eddie Izzard Any Tory Back bencher (not bothered about gender) The Queen 6. Not thinking Mr 'Cactus Wollo, how's ye father' Wolerton is a living legend. 7. For becoming an even mardier bastard before last year's exam . Chambers, as your dream women would say "Adam Chambers, you are the weakest link, Goodbye !!!" (Cheesy or what?) Send all complaints to beanokru@hotmail.com Hmm I can't really think of a link, oh well, here's some questions and answers from Hughes' interview. |
C-Bass - Other wise known nationwide as scallies, bad eggs or soz ards ("sorry I appear to be very hard"). They come in several forms- a)Baby C-Bass - those brought up by parent C-Bass b)Apprentice C-Bass - Young C-Bass destined to be bad boys c) C-bass' bitch (CBB) - Those naive bitches who are seen on the arms of older C-Bass d) Moral C-Bass - Stick to the C-Bass dress code, but hactually have moral's e) Yocal C-Bass - C-Bass who patrol the local vicinity f) EXTREME C-Bass - Usually pocess more than four parts of the Rockport uniform (see below). Don't look at them. Usually seen round Donny town scrounging money for the 'bus fare' home g) Psycho C-Bass - Smack heads. Don't walk past them. Usually seen round Donny town robbing people for the 'bus fare' home. h) Veteran C-Bass - An ageing C-Bass who is too 'hard' to convert into a "get it down ye' lad" Check out this superb site relating to the subject www.townieswhy.co.uk Rockport Massive - Collective term for a flock of C-Bass Rockport Massive uniform From head to toe Head - Baseball cap worn on crown of head Ear or mouth - Fag (cigarette) Neck - Gold chain (the bigger the 'harder') Chest - Daytime wear- stripey Kickers jumper, unless out thieving, then bulky Helly Hanson or Fred Perry coat. Night out- Ben Sherman shirt/stripey Kickers Polo shirt, if cold, stripey Kickers jumper Legs - Daytime wear- Addidas tracky bottoms Night out - Jeans Ankles - Loony toons socks tucked into trousers in order to display footwear. Footwear - Daytime- Reebok classics Anytime especially nights out - Rockports Get it darn ye lad - Someone who sits in a working man club harming nobody, who once was a moral C-Bass or a trade unoinist. They are now a dying breed and as are morale C-Bass. Sweddy - Originally fat old men who work in Danum school IT department. However they are now black wearing, life hating, angry young people, who listen to noise. As part of this we also made up a mock site, which is how we think a C-Bass website might appear, click here to see it In the early days when the Beanokru website was first establishing itself as the greatest site on the web, one of the most popular features was the guestbook, here are some of the highlights taken from what people had to say, The 6th of October 2000 saw the first appearance of our very own Bulgarian, HBMKFPT from JYJY, saying "You Ginner Prick" From: A sweddy Bastard Comment: Like the Gothic Website lots, it's rebellious and makes me want to slit my wrists. Grim Reaper rules !!!!!! (This goes back to when the site was all black and had the Grim Reaper on the front page, God only knows why) From: Daniel Reason: I found this site very interesting, it explores in depth the meaning of homosexuality. I'm glad the makers of this site have 'come out of the closet' if you will, and stood up for their gay rights and I congratulate you on being brave and standing up to gay bashing homos like me. If I was gay I would join the Beanokru quest for homosexuality. I think BiG Pete is very feminine and Boss is the trouser wearing individual in the relationship. BiG Pete's 'quaver' ears really turn my friend on. Wish you lots of luck in the future and hope you are successful in your cause, lots of love (not in that way Marsh) Daniel B.!!!!!! From: Boss Comments: In reply to Danny aka Brown, who claims i iz gay with Bg Pete fuck u, r u sure u didn't get us mixed up with yourself and Eyes. From Anup Chowdhury Comment: I think this site totally reeks of awsomeness, but you two Jabroni's better mention me in this site as I am part of this son of a %&$# Kru. And iff you don't God have mercy of your soul because I will tear each and every one of your limbs from limb. From: It doesn't matter what my name is Comment: I think your Kru is the single biggest jackass of a Kru running. Also would you please SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!! You are all small testicled dance music listening hermaephrodites (except Ginner who has the mental capacity of a lobsters left testicle) From: Paul Roberts Comment: I have decided to come out in public and tell everyone that I'm a homosexual and have been for the last 3 years. I would like to use this opportunity to ask BIG PETE if he would like to go out sometime soon. All my love Pansy Paul. From: Bob Random Comment: I would like to proportionally vocaslise BiG Pete and the rest of the Kru in their attempts to save this institutional website. Life wouldn't be worth living if this site gets axed....... From: I would prefer to remain annonymous Comment: We at the Guestbook committee of the Kru would like to award the young Bulgarian; HBMKFT for the best ever message on the site. He was from JYJY in Bulgaria and is the only Bulgarian to have anything to do with us. He is also the chairman of our worldwide fanbase. Thanks mate. Well done on the award. From HBMKFPT Comment: Thanks Kru, me and my country very proud of this honourable award. YOU GINNER PRICK. From: Rog the Bob Roberts Comment: Bob has come back to this website to pay tribute to the makers and members of the original Kru. They were the people who made not the Kru, not the silly kunts that you have added, which in my eyes are just WANNABES. Anyway now half of the kru have left Danum like Ste to work in subways and Fanny who has gone to check out the college pussy and Me who has gone to High Melton to pursue my footballing career and go to the U.S.A. and coach little kids (no Pete you can't come). From: Anon Comment: Rob u are such a selfcentred piece of shit, Beano, Marshall and BiG Pete are the Beanokru and they decide who is in the kru, You were one of the lesser members anyway and you should be looking to the future and the wellbeing of the Kru. They have sacrificed you to bring in new blood whilst yo usearch for fame and fortune in the world of Major League Soccer (like that's ever gunna happen!!!) Oh yeah u are also jealous of BiG Pete and Sarah. Before I started that section I thought there was some decent stuff in the Guestbook, but as you can see there wasn't, it's all just childish name calling, something we at the Beanokru deplore. Anyway, after taking over the guestbook with his fantasy Bulgarian bloke, BiG Pete became the first person to win the Gimp of the Month award, however the most popular choice for the coveted title was Lord Chambers when he scooped the award in September, here are some of the reasons why. |
As you can imagine finding the best bits of the Beanokru website has been very difficult, the fact is that particular phrase is a contradiction in terms, anyway instead of just forgetting about it, we simply took the least mediocre bits and banged them down here. First up is a popular part of the site, exmining the C-Bass phenomenom which is sweeping across Britain and asking why? |
C-Bass - Other wise known nationwide as scallies, bad eggs or soz ards ("sorry I appear to be very hard"). They come in several forms- a)Baby C-Bass - those brought up by parent C-Bass b)Apprentice C-Bass - Young C-Bass destined to be bad boys c) C-bass' bitch (CBB) - Those naive bitches who are seen on the arms of older C-Bass d) Moral C-Bass - Stick to the C-Bass dress code, but hactually have moral's e) Yocal C-Bass - C-Bass who patrol the local vicinity f) EXTREME C-Bass - Usually pocess more than four parts of the Rockport uniform (see below). Don't look at them. Usually seen round Donny town scrounging money for the 'bus fare' home g) Psycho C-Bass - Smack heads. Don't walk past them. Usually seen round Donny town robbing people for the 'bus fare' home. h) Veteran C-Bass - An ageing C-Bass who is too 'hard' to convert into a "get it down ye' lad" Check out this superb site relating to the subject www.townieswhy.co.uk Rockport Massive - Collective term for a flock of C-Bass Rockport Massive uniform From head to toe Head - Baseball cap worn on crown of head Ear or mouth - Fag (cigarette) Neck - Gold chain (the bigger the 'harder') Chest - Daytime wear- stripey Kickers jumper, unless out thieving, then bulky Helly Hanson or Fred Perry coat. Night out- Ben Sherman shirt/stripey Kickers Polo shirt, if cold, stripey Kickers jumper Legs - Daytime wear- Addidas tracky bottoms Night out - Jeans Ankles - Loony toons socks tucked into trousers in order to display footwear. Footwear - Daytime- Reebok classics Anytime especially nights out - Rockports Get it darn ye lad - Someone who sits in a working man club harming nobody, who once was a moral C-Bass or a trade unoinist. They are now a dying breed and as are morale C-Bass. Sweddy - Originally fat old men who work in Danum school IT department. However they are now black wearing, life hating, angry young people, who listen to noise. As part of this we also made up a mock site, which is how we think a C-Bass website might appear, click here to see it In the early days when the Beanokru website was first establishing itself as the greatest site on the web, one of the most popular features was the guestbook, here are some of the highlights taken from what people had to say, The 6th of October 2000 saw the first appearance of our very own Bulgarian, HBMKFPT from JYJY, saying "You Ginner Prick" From: A sweddy Bastard Comment: Like the Gothic Website lots, it's rebellious and makes me want to slit my wrists. Grim Reaper rules !!!!!! (This goes back to when the site was all black and had the Grim Reaper on the front page, God only knows why) From: Daniel Reason: I found this site very interesting, it explores in depth the meaning of homosexuality. I'm glad the makers of this site have 'come out of the closet' if you will, and stood up for their gay rights and I congratulate you on being brave and standing up to gay bashing homos like me. If I was gay I would join the Beanokru quest for homosexuality. I think BiG Pete is very feminine and Boss is the trouser wearing individual in the relationship. BiG Pete's 'quaver' ears really turn my friend on. Wish you lots of luck in the future and hope you are successful in your cause, lots of love (not in that way Marsh) Daniel B.!!!!!! From: Boss Comments: In reply to Danny aka Brown, who claims i iz gay with Bg Pete fuck u, r u sure u didn't get us mixed up with yourself and Eyes. From Anup Chowdhury Comment: I think this site totally reeks of awsomeness, but you two Jabroni's better mention me in this site as I am part of this son of a %&$# Kru. And iff you don't God have mercy of your soul because I will tear each and every one of your limbs from limb. From: It doesn't matter what my name is Comment: I think your Kru is the single biggest jackass of a Kru running. Also would you please SHUT THE HELL UP!!!!! You are all small testicled dance music listening hermaephrodites (except Ginner who has the mental capacity of a lobsters left testicle) From: Paul Roberts Comment: I have decided to come out in public and tell everyone that I'm a homosexual and have been for the last 3 years. I would like to use this opportunity to ask BIG PETE if he would like to go out sometime soon. All my love Pansy Paul. From: Bob Random Comment: I would like to proportionally vocaslise BiG Pete and the rest of the Kru in their attempts to save this institutional website. Life wouldn't be worth living if this site gets axed....... From: I would prefer to remain annonymous Comment: We at the Guestbook committee of the Kru would like to award the young Bulgarian; HBMKFT for the best ever message on the site. He was from JYJY in Bulgaria and is the only Bulgarian to have anything to do with us. He is also the chairman of our worldwide fanbase. Thanks mate. Well done on the award. From HBMKFPT Comment: Thanks Kru, me and my country very proud of this honourable award. YOU GINNER PRICK. From: Rog the Bob Roberts Comment: Bob has come back to this website to pay tribute to the makers and members of the original Kru. They were the people who made not the Kru, not the silly kunts that you have added, which in my eyes are just WANNABES. Anyway now half of the kru have left Danum like Ste to work in subways and Fanny who has gone to check out the college pussy and Me who has gone to High Melton to pursue my footballing career and go to the U.S.A. and coach little kids (no Pete you can't come). From: Anon Comment: Rob u are such a selfcentred piece of shit, Beano, Marshall and BiG Pete are the Beanokru and they decide who is in the kru, You were one of the lesser members anyway and you should be looking to the future and the wellbeing of the Kru. They have sacrificed you to bring in new blood whilst yo usearch for fame and fortune in the world of Major League Soccer (like that's ever gunna happen!!!) Oh yeah u are also jealous of BiG Pete and Sarah. Before I started that section I thought there was some decent stuff in the Guestbook, but as you can see there wasn't, it's all just childish name calling, something we at the Beanokru deplore. Anyway, after taking over the guestbook with his fantasy Bulgarian bloke, BiG Pete became the first person to win the Gimp of the Month award, however the most popular choice for the coveted title was Lord Chambers when he scooped the award in September, here are some of the reasons why. |
It appears Democracy has failed Lord Chambers again. The old facist won't be best pleased to learn he has been voted September's Gimp of the month. But the vote was unanimous. 1. His regualar outbursts, concerning the working classes and the North/South divide 2. He thinks he is ace at tennis and fencing 3. He thinks he is the best at history, politics, debating; no Chambers you are only the best at being big headed 4. He won't visit our website, even though he is dying to. If you are reading this Chambers, we win, ha, ha, ha 5.He has schoolboy crushes on the following:- Ann Widdecombe Margaret Thatcher Eddie Izzard Any Tory Back bencher (not bothered about gender) The Queen 6. Not thinking Mr 'Cactus Wollo, how's ye father' Wolerton is a living legend. 7. For becoming an even mardier bastard before last year's exam . Chambers, as your dream women would say "Adam Chambers, you are the weakest link, Goodbye !!!" (Cheesy or what?) Send all complaints to beanokru@hotmail.com Hmm I can't really think of a link, oh well, here's some questions and answers from Hughes' interview. |
J Joanne, she'll kill me if I say anything else Caprice Superdrug, 39p a tub You tell me! His little dick counts up for it (e-mail me if that makes sense to you) Sardines Miss Jackson (the veteran librarian, followed by a moment of hesitation), er...no Miss Mitchell It should be abolished! Aight Herby Scracthing my arse Any other comments, rumours etc. No comment Well as Virtual Illusion would probably say, that interview came to a raging anti-climax. More about VI at www.virtualillusion.org.uk And now some questions from Fake ID's interview |
Despite his hectic rock and roll lifestyle, Virtual Illusion frontman Christian Derick Deboleux Hughes, aka Cheesy Gringos, still managed to give up 5 minutes of his time, to give a deep, probing, intellectual interview. Well it's all true except the last bit Joanne (Hughes' lass) or Caprice? Caprice or Joanne Christian; hair gel obviously plays an important part in your life, what is your prefered brand? How can you walk around like that, without getting lynched? How does Hurby get into a gig, looking like that, without getting lynched Pilchards or Sardines? Most fanciable teacher at Danum? Any views on the death penalty? Being the lead singer and also having a dabble on the piano and the guitar, you must be the most talented member of the band, is this true? If you become famous who do you think will be the first member of Virtual Illusion to go of the rails? Picking your nose or scratching your arse? |
Beanokru: Sex? Fake ID: Yep Name an ancient civilisation? The Minoans Who in your opinion is the sexiest woman in the world? My Grandma (we didn't know you were like that) Who in your opinion is the sexiest man in the world? My Grandad (we certainly didn't know you were like that) Who in your opinion is the sexiest manly woman, Helga, Sheila etc. Erm let me think....I don't know What should we do with the Welsh? Nuke 'em How much does a tin of Heinz Baked Beans cost? 20p (Clearly not a man of the people, you would expect to pay between about 35p and 45p) How about a pint of milk? No thanks Are the Irish really thick? Obviously yes Favourite mathematical equation? 2 Y=MX + C Favourite coloured Smartie? Blue ones France or Germany? Neither (laughs) What is the capital of Australia? Oh I know this......Canberra (correct) Speaking of Australia why do they always beat us at sport? a) Because they're a bunch of psychopathic ex-convicts, who are as thick as pig shit, but by the law of averages they have to be good at something b) England are crap at sport c) Who gives a shit about rugby, cricket, tennis, athletics, swimming etc, at least we can beat them at football.....probably d) all three of the above E - Teachers at school are crap and we get no sport (We obviously hit a raw nerve) Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera Christina Any opinion on asylum seekers? Let em stay, I'm a liberal guy Do you think we should scrap the monarchy? Erm, yes their useless and do nothing Have you ever been to America? No, never want to go And finally, which of your nicknames is more embarrassing? a) Fake ID- For the crap fake ID you once pocessed b) EMI - For your failed attempt to get a record deal with EMI, at the age of 11, after sending off a tape with you singing and playing the piano. I'm proud of the EMI experience, so Fake ID. Anything you'd like to add Everybody back Sunderland to win the title next season and please,please,please,please visit my Mohobishopi website. Well what can we draw from that interview. Fake ID is a liberal guy who wants to Nuke Wales, hates Germany, France and America. He also took a ride on Christina Aguilera a fortnight ago and has a fetish for Haddock and grandparents (think about the first 2 questions and the ones about Bikes and Christina Aguilera). And finally a fake advertisement we knocked up as part of a Random Rant about sueing. |
s |
